Today is the start of and obviously the first day of my and many others end of year examination. It proceeded on as per normal, English Paper 1 was and will always be the first paper. Maybe for this year, English as a subject may seem much more significant than the rest of the years. Chances of getting retain because of failing English can be quite scary.

I got the question paper like everyone else did and to my surprised I didn't really know which question should I attempt. It was all kind of tricky. The question looked interesting and you would have thought that you have every points just for it. I was tempted to do the argumentative one but it occured to me that my future hangs in the balance. Then I looked on to other question, it was to recount an occasion that your decision actually made everyone else disappointed with you. Cant really write that, can you? You will never ever get close to whats on everyone's mind simultaneously. If you can, it means either you're lying or majority of the people in the world are idiots, in which case the majority would see you as "banana". Next I saw the very first question, "Determination".

I just started writing something out in the answer script, starting out with big sayings like determination had and will always be the driving force for anything to achieve its success and so on. Then I got stucked just right at the second paragraph, no idea how I'm going to carry on. So I just got on to impromptu, like how I'm writing for blog post. Writing out whatever comes to my mind. It may sound crazy and suiciding but at the end it all make sense and it did linked things up. I wrote about some thing I remembered when I was in primary school and mixed it with some imaginations, then linked it up with what happened in my secondary 2 years. Not really an literal account though, more metaphorically like figure of speech. After I wrote and concluded the essay, my mind just turned on started itself doing reflection.

Of course its about determination. I wrote in my essay that there is a downside to it. You could end up being obsessed with yourself, your aspiration and in due time self destruct. To some people it might hold true, to others it might not. To others, maybe those that had self destructed wasn't incisive with their direction or wasn't determine enough.

So what I'm trying to really say is, it has come to my mind that there is a high chance, the existence of absolute truths and answers or solutions for anything might not be possible. From here, you could see that truths are likely to be relative than absolute in some cases.

Therefore my point being, when you want to see results for something, you do something about it, anything. If you do nothing by just going through the motion (also means doing the same thing expecting different results), nothing changes. Somehow whether you failed or you succeed, you will have the right answer to your situation. Cause the ironic here is that you cant know whether you failed or succeed without having an answer meant for your situation.

Which also proves this quote "Everything will be okay in the end, if its not okay, its not the end". However, at least for me, common sense will tell me its crap. If the quote is true, life is meaningless. What's the point of being "okay" at the end, when you know you cannot really be literally at the end and know its the end, unless you've been there and managed to come back, which is still not the end. Ultimately, the end is the end, nothing else. If being okay at the end is the answer to you then starting a "start" would be meaningless. Because when there is no start, it would have already been an end, which is nothingness, which is "okay" in that sense for the quote.

SEE, its relative! I just wrote out two things that makes sense but yet completely contradicts each other. The contradiction being, the earlier paragraph tells you to do something to get your answer, the next paragraph tells you to do nothing and you would get your answer and be okay in the end.

You can see it as an paradox or an anomaly, OR you can take that there really isn't a definite or absolute in something. If you do think there is definites and absolutes, you would indirectly be claiming that you know everything in the world, in which case you don't. Because by calling definite, you rule out all other possible possibilities possible.

So the questions remains:
Relativity
1. Is your life full of significance or is it meaningless?
2. Is there an answer to everything or there's no solution?



(I hope until here it had at least made you think, so if you're really miserable and feel life's meaningless then the thinking would have made it significant, which is again insignificant for you if you think life is meaningless)



This post is really just for me to keep a record in my archive, so when I look back in the future I need not do any further thinking than this. Sorry if you're tortured =)